ZipGolfer » Features http://www.zipgolfer.com Golf tips, news and gear reviews Sun, 18 Dec 2011 18:03:53 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 Best Lob Wedge | 2011 Golf Wedges Review http://www.zipgolfer.com/best-lob-wedge-2011-golf-wedges-review/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/best-lob-wedge-2011-golf-wedges-review/#comments Mon, 03 Oct 2011 06:05:10 +0000 Mark http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4714 lob wedgeBest Lob Wedge for Your Game

The time will come when you need to make a wedge shot that calls for a high carry, over a water hazard or bunker, to a tight, tucked pin position. The question is -- do you have the right wedge? If you have the usual 56-degree sand wedge, you might be able to pull it off. However, using a lob wedge -- properly suited to your game -- can definitely make reaching that difficult hole location much, much easier.

Let's start with some common terminology:

The term Lob Wedge covers any wedge with a loft between 58-64 degrees. Bounce Angle, or sometimes just Bounce, is a measure of the backward/downward angle of the sole of the club as measured from the leading edge to the lowest point on the sole. The problem that many golfers face is the low bounce angle of some lob wedges. The more lofted the wedge -- combined with a low bounce angle -- will literally act like a digging tool and, in the hands of less than an expert golfer, they will end up taking massive divots. Conversely, in the hands of a more experienced golfer with proper swing mechanics and the correct descending blow, a lob wedge adds a measure of dimension and versatility to any short game. If you're planning to buy a lob wedge, here are some simple tips and suggestions.

Beginner

For a novice, try a lob wedge that has no more than 60 degrees of loft. Though it seems counterintuitive, the higher-lofted wedge is actually more difficult to master. I say this from painful, firsthand experience, having jumped into a 64-degree wedge only to find I could hit it correctly about 1 in 20 tries. The second key is to select a wedge whose bounce angle spans from 6 to as much as 13 degrees. The reason here is: the higher the bounce angle, the easier it is to use the wedge since it will not dig into the turf excessively. Also, if you are trying to combine wedge uses, a wedge with a significant bounce angle that is also high lofted can double as a sand wedge for short bunker shots.

This advice assumes you already carry at least a standard Pitching wedge (about 47-49 degrees) and perhaps a Gap Wedge (51-54 degrees) which are both a must for beginners. As you will learn over time, having four wedges will become an advantage as your game improves.

Intermediate

As an intermediate golfer, your game has entered the range where you can start to look at a little more loft and/or a little less bounce on your Lob Wedge. While there are 64-degree options out there, I would suggest you stick with nothing more than a 60 or 62-degree, but perhaps narrow the bounce to 5-8 degrees. This combination will allow for a bit more versatility in using the club from both tight and fluffy lies (from a tight lie, a lot of bounce on the club is a disaster-in-the-making for anyone other than an expert player). A good choice here is the F2 series, in a 60 degree. It is equipped with their Face Forward technology that lets you forget about topping/skulling the shot or shanking the ball off the hosel.
One of my personal favorites -- and one that is always in my bag -- is the Cleveland 588 series; I carry the 58-degree with 6 degrees of bounce. These are available in a variety of loft/bounce combinations. A little experimentation to find your perfect fit is always a good idea.

Expert/Low Handicapper

Your choices are nearly without limit as an expert golfer, and adding a 64-degree wedge is certainly within the scope of your ability. Again Cleveland makes a version, as does TaylorMade, Titleist, Callaway, Ping, and many others in the premium club category. For the more budget-conscious golfer, Pine Meadow and Hi-Lob make decent options as well. With a 64-degree wedge, you can expect to see a maximum carry in the range of about 75 yards. The high-lofted wedge allows the expert golfer to maneuver shots into very tightly tucked pin locations and to get the ball up and down when short-sided near the hole.

Unlike the Intermediate player, you’re now able to use a lob wedge with nearly any bounce angle. Your swing and ball contact are probably sufficiently advanced as to avoid taking a huge divot and "laying the sod over the ball."  Secondarily, by manipulating the club face open, you can actually create bounce from many lies giving you an even more versatile club for your bag.

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The Best & Longest Driver | 2011 Golf Club Review http://www.zipgolfer.com/the-best-longest-driver-2011-golf-club-review/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/the-best-longest-driver-2011-golf-club-review/#comments Mon, 26 Sep 2011 06:06:43 +0000 Mark http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4716 long driverAs golfers, we are all -- or most of us anyway – searching for that extra length in our shots, but none more so than the driver. If you have followed golf club technology with even the barest of glances over the past few years, you’ve seen some remarkable improvements in the advancement of driver design and performance -- clubs that are very long, but also easier to hit.

Finding the "longest driver" for you is a very personal thing. While there are certainly claims made by every club manufacturer that theirs is the longest, the simple answer is:  it might be different for you than for me. Different for me than my golfing buddy, etc.

Let’s look at a couple of the key components to distance, see how those fit into a driver, and ultimately, what you should look for.

The head of the driver often gets the most attention – and why not? It’s easily the most notable thing about the club, carries the color, design, name and more of the maker, and is the sexiest bit there is. So take a good look at the head of each driver. What is the loft? How deep is the face? What is it made of? What color is it? Many of these aspects are purely cosmetic, and you simply need to be comfortable looking at it and knowing it will do what you want. Other aspects -- like loft -- are very technical, and the correct loft to maximize your swing is probably a lot different from what Tiger, Phil, or Rory use. For most amateurs, a driver with a loft between 8.5 and 10 degrees is going to perform the best.

Now take a look at the shaft. It almost goes without saying, the shaft is the most overlooked, yet perhaps most important part of any golf club. Not choosing the correct shaft (or not even looking at it) is like buying a car without knowing or caring what type of engine it has. The shaft is what makes the club go. It is literally the engine of the golf club. For most people (and I mean nearly everyone) that play golf, a graphite or composite shaft in your driver is the way to go. However, most people don’t understand why that is so. The reasons are fairly simple, once you can connect them to a cause and effect.

Number One is Weight. A graphite shaft is lighter than its steel counterpart. Less weight equals more speed, and speed is ultimately what makes the ball go farther. A short physics lesson here; the equation for distance is: M x S2 = D where M = mass, S = speed and D = distance. Since this is a simple multiplication formula, if either Mass or Speed is increased, so is Distance. For most people, adding weight to the club (the Mass part of the equation) will reduce speed. Conversely, by decreasing the weight, you increase speed. The reason this is important is because we have the benefit of "squaring" (speed x speed) the speed in this equation, and thus see an exponential increase in distance by decreasing weight and increasing speed.

Number Two is Strength. Again, the strength of a graphite shaft is greater (at a lesser weight) than steel. Performance characteristics can be built into a graphite shaft that simply cannot be put into a steel shaft.

Number Three is Flex. While every shaft (regardless of material) has a flex to which it is designed, graphite can be so specific as to vary the flex point along the length of the shaft, increase strength in the tip or butt, and other fine-tuning adjustments.

The combination of these three factors, when fitted to your swing, will help to produce the greatest possible distance for you.

Finally, take a look at the grip. While the decision to use a club or not should never be based on the grip -- they can so easily be changed to suit your taste -- it should have some consideration. Remember, there is a proper grip size for everyone. Just like a medium-size shirt doesn’t fit everyone, neither does a medium-size grip. Pay attention to getting the correct size for you and you’ll swing easier, with less fatigue, and have better results doing it.

After laying out all of these considerations, I’m sure what most people really want is some suggestions on what are the hottest, longest drivers out there. Here are two that are definitely worth a look:

The first entry is the Razr Hawk by Callaway Golf. This club is made from an entirely new material developed in conjunction with some other researchers who know a thing or two about speed -- Italian automaker Lamborghini. This very unique process allows for over a half-a-million micro-fibers per square inch in the composite matrix, creating a material that is lighter and stronger than titanium (commonly used as a lightweight, but strong material).

What separates this technology from similar efforts is the ability to forge the material to a tolerance of one one-thousandth of an inch. This precision milling technique allows Callaway to eliminate all non-essential weight from the club. Callaway claims this material and forging process is the future of golf –-- here today. The nature of the production process allows for both maximum forgiveness on off-center hits and maximum club-head speed -- the holy grail of driver distance.

Callaway claims they are able to eliminate as much as 25% of the club’s weight. By taking weight away from the club head, the company has been able to redistribute weight to other, highly essential components of the club, mainly the shaft. Adding a longer shaft will add distance. The lighter club head, slightly longer shaft, and incredible aerodynamics are reportedly adding an average of 8 yards to each drive during tests with PGA Touring Professionals.

The next entry is the newly minted TaylorMade R11, which offers all-in-one club fitting. "Turbostratic" describes the atomic structure of the high-strength carbon fibers used in the TaylorMade Forged Composite. Sheets of carbon atoms are intertwined and aligned with the length of the fiber to provide a much higher strength than typical titanium fibers.

The official definition is: “A type of crystalline structure where the basal planes have slipped sideways relative to each other, causing the spacing between planes to be greater than ideal”. Does that simply mean there is more air in between each micro fiber?

TaylorMade has brought a handful of new innovations to the driver marketplace in recent years with their very successful "R" line. First, it was the introduction of Moveable Weight Technology (MWT) in the R7, followed by Flight Control Technology (FCT) in the R9.

TaylorMade has made even more advancements with the R11, which features what they call Adjustable Sole Technology (AST). Simply put, AST allows the player to adjust the face angle of the club from open, to neutral, to closed, depending on what best fits their game. In addition to this new technology, the R11 sports a matte white paint scheme on its crown (the combination of white crown and black face is supposed to help with alignment). This new, very cool look has already generated plenty of talk, as has the new AST now that the R11 is fully into the market.

Both of these drivers are complex -- using the latest in both manufacturing and design technology. The best advice would be to just head to your local golf shop or retailer and try them both.

Given all you now know about choosing a driver, one of these might be the best one for you -- but then again, it might not. Happy hunting.

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Graphite vs Steel Shafts | Choosing the Best Golf Shaft http://www.zipgolfer.com/graphite-vs-steel-shafts-choosing-the-best-golf-shaft/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/graphite-vs-steel-shafts-choosing-the-best-golf-shaft/#comments Tue, 06 Sep 2011 01:01:33 +0000 Robert http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4683 Steel or Graphite? It’s the question that has confounded men throughout the ages, among others: “Why are we here?” “How did the universe begin?” “What did the dryer do with my other sock?” And “Why isn’t there a 10-iron?”

By the time you finish this article, you will have answers to at least one of these questions.

Let’s talk shafts.

Remember Gramps talking about the days of the hickory-shafted Brassie, Mashee, and Niblick?

In the 1920s, the company that eventually became True Temper developed the steel shaft that would revolutionize the game. The slow, flip-wristed “handsy” swing predicated by high torque hickory shafts evolved into the modern, powerful fast “body-swing” that it is today.

In the 1970s, the graphite shaft was born, making golf clubs lighter and (in theory) stronger. However, the prototypes were inconsistent and had too much twist and torque.

Of course, today they have perfected the graphite shaft, and you’d be hard-pressed to find anybody (besides Gramps) that doesn’t have a graphite shaft in their driver.

 

Flex

Here’s a quick education on flex to get you up to speed (literally). Both graphite and steel shafts come in a variety of flexes. Flex is the amount of bend in a shaft when you swing it. The general categories are as follows: L (ladies), A (senior), R (regular), S (stiff), and X (extra stiff), least to most flexible, respectively.

When you swing a golf club, the shaft bends or loads on the backswing like a spring. Ideally, at impact, the spring will kick and deliver the stored energy into the back of your golf ball -- BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE! If the shaft is too stiff for you, then the club won’t load resulting from loss of distance. If the shaft is not stiff enough, then the shaft will be more flippy than a Slinky, and you’ll spray the ball all over the golf course.

The Golden Rule of Flex: Choose the most flexible shaft that you can control.

Below, I’ve drawn up a general guideline:

Most people over-estimate their swing speed and buy shafts that are too stiff. Also, it’s important to remember: there are no set parameters from one club maker to the next. Depending on the make and model, an R-shaft in one model may be stiffer than an R-shaft in another. (If I’ve just confused you more than when you started this article, I’m sorry. Keep reading!)

At most golf shops, you can have your swing speed measured and plug that data into the Web. There is no standard, but generally men swing their longer clubs (drivers/woods) 90 mph, and their irons slightly slower.

Steel Shafts

Pros: Control, Price and Durability. All PGA Tour players use steel shafts in their irons, save one (Matt Kuchar uses Aerotech SteelFiber graphite shafts. See below). They like the consistency and feel of steel. Standard steel shafts weigh about 125 grams (compared to graphite, which is less than half of that.) Keep in mind tour players are swinging it on average about 125 mph. Thus, they’re not too concerned about more distance.

Cons: Heavy, More vibration, Shorter Distance. With control and responsiveness of the steel, you are giving up some distance and dampening that comes standard in graphite shafts. Even the True Temper Sensicore shafts aren’t nearly as soft and easy on the wrists and elbows as graphite.

True Temper Dynamic Gold ($14) (120 grams) (Low Flight) is the most common shaft used on the PGA Tour (and everywhere else). Most pros choose either the X100 or S400. I recommend Dynamic Gold shafts for mid-low handicap players who want a low, penetrating ball flight with the greatest control and accuracy.

True Temper Dynamic Gold SL ($17) (99 grams) (Low Flight) is the same shaft as the standard, only lighter. They use an alloy steel to reduce weight by 20 percent. The ball flight, control, and feel are the same. I recommend this shaft for mid-low handicap players who want the same penetrating ball flight as the Dynamic Gold while increasing their swing speed.

True Temper Dynamic Gold GS75 ($25) (75 grams) (High Flight) is the lightest steel shaft (really an alloy) you are going to find, but you are paying a premium for it. The ball flight is higher, but it has similar control as the standard. I recommend this shaft for mid-low handicappers wanting the feel of graphite.

True Temper High Launch ($14) (111 grams) (High Flight) is the same shaft as the standard only with lightweight responsive tip designed to launch the ball higher. The control and feel are the same. I recommend this shaft for mid-high handicap players who more control with a higher ball flight.

True Temper Sensicore ($17) is the same shaft as the standard only with a composite core and inserts that eliminate 70% of the vibration. (See Steel Shaft Cons.) You can get all of the True Temper designs with the Sensicore inserts.

Project X Rifle Shaft Tapered ($33) (120 grams) (Low Flight) is a shaft that has a slightly softer feel then the standard True Temper with a very discrete constant taper – like a rifle muzzle. The price puts them in an elite category. This taper design results in more energy being transferred to the golf ball. I recommend these shafts for mid-low handicappers who are looking for control with a ball-flight that gets up quicker but swiftly flattens out.

Project X Flighted ($35) (125 grams) (Low Flight) is also very popular on the PGA Tour. Titleist uses these in many of their irons as well. This shaft has a different kick point within each shaft. Long irons have a lower kickpoint for a higher ball flight, whereas short irons have a higher kickpoint for a lower flight and optimal control. The price puts them in an elite category.
I recommend these irons for mid-low handicappers looking for a dynamic kick point for the ultimate in playability and control.

Graphite Shafts

Pros: Lightweight, Dampening, Longer Distance. The majority of amateurs are (and should be) using graphite shafts in their irons. Most of us can use the added distance. Plus, if you aren't playing every day, then you want to give your hands, wrists, and elbow a break when you do. The shock at impact is much less when using graphite, which you’ll find out very quickly when you play in cold weather. Graphite shafts tend to be a little longer in standard irons. If you are concerned about control (because of lack of strength or height), have your graphite shafts cut to steel shaft length. And remember, just because the club is lighter doesn't mean you should swing harder (a common mistake). Swing with a smooth tempo, and the club will naturally go faster and the ball farther.

Cons: Less control, More expensive, Durability. If you’re the guy who calculates to the half-yard how far your 9-iron flies, you’re not going to even humor switching to graphite irons. If you are somewhere in between, then I’d recommend trying some graphite shafts, while keeping your wedges in a steel shaft. Finally, as you will see below, graphite is more expensive and tends to wear quicker.

Below I’ve listed some of the leading graphite shafts and also some of the leading irons that come with their own custom graphite shafts:

ACCRA DyMatch i Series Shafts Tour 40i-90i (49 grams - 83 grams) ($100). This is a tour-quality shaft that has six different types from Tour 40i – Tour 90i (lightest to stiffest). You have the ability to mix multiple weights within each set based on your launch preferences and ball flight. I recommend this shaft for all levels, but especially those looking for extra distance for some extra cash.

Graphite Design Tour AD 85 (87 grams) ($69). These graphite irons shafts contain the highest fiber and lowest resin content of all the shafts in the line. This increases control and feel. This shaft is good for everybody, but especially the players looking for more control with more distance.

Aero-Tech Steel Fiber I 95 Iron Shaft (70-90 grams) ($41). This is the brand that Matt Kucher is playing on the PGA Tour. You can expect superior control and feel with these shafts without giving up the distance. All levels can appreciate these shafts.

Aldila NV Comp (77grams – 88 grams) ($45). I see these shaft everywhere. They have a soft feel with great control. They have a dampening system using Micro Laminate Technology. I recommend these for all levels.

Grafalloy ProLaunch Red and ProLaunch Blue (77grams – 109 grams) ($30). These are the most reasonably priced shafts for the quality. They feature a Micromesh Tip technology that stabilizes the shaft at impact. The Red is stiffer for faster swingers and has a low ball flight, while the blue is softer for slower swingers with a higher ball flight.

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Best Putters in Golf 2011 | Choosing a Putter For Beginner, Intermediate & Advanced Golfers http://www.zipgolfer.com/best-putters-in-golf-2011-choosing-a-putter-for-beginner-intermediate-advanced-golfers/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/best-putters-in-golf-2011-choosing-a-putter-for-beginner-intermediate-advanced-golfers/#comments Sat, 03 Sep 2011 01:00:45 +0000 Mark http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4676 SC putterChoosing the Best Putter -- For YOU

More than any other club in your bag, the putter is the most personal and -- for most of us -- the most intimate of player/club relationships. Many of us still have our very first putter, or the one we made our first birdie with, or the one we shot our lowest round with, etc. While the best putter for you is the one that gets the ball in the hole, there are some differences -- in both design and performance -- that will help your putting game, whether you shoot 72 or 102.

Beginning Golfer

There are two basic types of putters: Blade and Mallet. A blade putter is narrow (front to back) and often incorporates extra weighting in the heel and toe of the putter head. The shaft can be attached in any number of ways, but in general is aligned more closely with the center of the club head. A mallet is often as deep (or deeper) than it is is wide. Again, shafts can be attached in any number of ways. Mallet style putters often feature additional "alignment aids" and, due to their larger size, are generally effective with this technique. Within each of these two categories are an infinite number of variations on each type. The putter is easily the most varied piece of golf equipment -- almost hard to believe when you look at the number of drivers available these days -- but true nonetheless.

Since beginning golfers tend to be inconsistent with their putting stroke, a heavier putter is recommended -- the mallet type is often heavier -- which can result in a slower, smoother, and more consistent pendulum-like stroke. Since most beginners don't have unlimited funds with which to experiment with different putters, check out places like your local swap meets, second-hand stores, Play-It-Again Sports outlet, or the used putter barrel at your driving range or golf course, and poke around. Most of these places will have a putting green for you to try things out on, and the golf course or driving range will almost certainly let you take it our for a spin to see how it feels. I went through 4 or 5 putter types in my early years in golf and never spent more than $20 on any one of them. (Most of which I still have today... because you just never know!)

Some good performance and good buys in used mallets are the original Zebra putter (Zebra Golf), the TaylorMade Rossi Monza model and the Odyssey (Callaway) Two-Ball putter. The important thing for a beginner to remember is to try out as many putters as you can, until you find the right one for you -- a putter you feel comfortable and confident with. In time, your putting average will come down and you'll have fewer three-putts and more one-putt greens.

Intermediate Golfer

This is perhaps the toughest category to highlight a putter for. Your game is good enough that most any putter on the market could work for you, be it mallet, blade, or anything else that might be available. Yet there are some things to be aware of as your game progresses and your putting becomes more consistent.

As you have passed through and beyond the beginning golfer stage, your putting stroke has probably gotten more consistence, reliable, and even. However, if you're still in this stage, chances are your stroke lets you down in one of two ways: either your distance control or direction. Since harnessing both of these is critical to good putting, let's take a look at what putters can help you improve each of these areas.

Distance Control: perhaps more even than direction, nothing is more frustrating than hitting your putt exactly on the line you want, but having it come up 6 feet short, or blast 10 feet past the hole. If you generally play on very fast and firm greens, then a heavier putter is probably best. If you play more on rougher, slower greens, then a lighter putter might improve your overall performance. You may have reached the point in your game where getting fit for a putter is a good idea. If putting is the best part of your game, then taking the time to be fit for a putter with the proper loft, length, lie, etc., could be a wise investment. However, maybe you're just looking for an upgrade and want to try the latest, greatest thing. Just as a heavy putter can be a good thing for a beginner, the tables can turn, and it could be disastrous for a better player. As your putting stroke improves, a heavy putter can often begin to feel sluggish and unresponsive in your hands. You'll also need to pay attention to the sound of the ball coming off the putter face. Again, a heavy putter may have a dead sound and not give the feedback that you need to continue to improve. Some popular options for this category are the Ping Scottsdale Anser 2, and the TaylorMade Ghost TM-110 Tour.

Advanced Golfer

If you're a single-digit player, putting is more than likely one of the best parts of your game. You may even have the first putter you ever played with and have just learned to use it more effectively. However, if you're like most of us, a new putter is nearly always an option. At the top end of the scale are the boutique putters from makers like Bettinardi, Scotty Cameron, T.P. Mills, and others. At this level, you select a basic model and then all of the characteristics -- loft, lie, weight, length, etc. -- are dialed in to your specifications. You can even be custom fit for a putter (though the equipment needed to do so is expensive and thus somewhat hard to find). Expect the price tag for a custom putter to start in the $300 range and go up from there. It's no coincidence the majority of better players use some form of a blade style putter. A blade has come to encompass some pretty radical designs, but at the end of the day, it still qualifies as one. As you strive to shave those last few strokes from your handicap, make sure to consider things like the proper length (many, many golfers use a putter far too long for them) and grip size. Even the grip texture can have an influence on your stroke.

The final thing to consider is the long putter. Ten years ago, this was seen as a crutch for poor putting; now, this style of putter has seen a nearly 180-degree turn in acceptance. With players like Adam Scott, Ernie Els, Fred Couples, and many more using some form of a long putter, it no longer has such a negative stigma associated with it. Just like their shorter counterparts, long putters come in both blade and mallet designs and have many of the same playing characteristics.

Summary

While the information and thoughts above will certainly give you some guidance and direction on choosing a putter, the bottom line is: find the one that feels good to you. Just because you're a 25-handicap doesn't mean a Scotty Cameron Newport putter won't work for you. If it gets the ball in the hole on a consistent basis, then it is the right putter for you.

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Regripping Golf Clubs | How to Regrip a Club DIY http://www.zipgolfer.com/regripping-golf-clubs/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/regripping-golf-clubs/#comments Mon, 08 Aug 2011 21:19:23 +0000 Mark http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4598 Admit it... your golf club grips have got to get replaced this year -- the same thing you've been saying now for the past three seasons. But, you know the local pro shop charges $5.00 per, plus the cost of the grips, and you're sure you could do it yourself if you just had a little direction. You've come to the right spot, because what follows is a tutorial on replacing your own golf grips (and maybe a buddy or two that also need it done). And you're right; you can do it yourself.

Evaluate

The first thing to do when faced with a re-grip job is to evaluate what is already there. Are they rubber? Cord? Half-Cord? Leather? Next, take a moment to measure them. Yes, believe it or not, grips come in different sizes for both the core (inside) and diameter (outside) or can be adjusted to different sizes, and a proper fitting grip is very important to hitting consistent golf shots. There are many tools available from various supply houses like Golfsmith or Golfworks.com, and I'll mention them along the way.

The first is a grip gauge -- a useful and inexpensive tool to have.

Measure the grip approximately 2" down from the butt to determine its size.

Take note of the size, as you'll need it later on (in this example, the grip is + 1/32" over standard).

Removal

The next step is removal of the old grips. This step can be as simple as slitting the grip lengthwise...

(Use a utility knife with a reverse blade...)

And then peeling it off (this is mostly what you'll get):

Or it can be as difficult as chipping the grip off with a curved chisel in tiny, frustrating, curse-inducing increments (rare, but it happens).

Generally speaking, if the grip is 2-3 years old, it will come off with relative ease. Older than that, and the rubber starts to break down and seems to nearly fuse to the shaft of the club. Once the grip itself is removed, scrape and/or peel the excess grip tape from the shaft to get it to bare metal or graphite. The last bit of residue can be removed with a solvent like acetone or paint thinner. The purpose of getting the shaft clean is to ensure a smooth surface for the new grip, as well as a clean surface for the new grip tape and solvent to adhere to.

While this is rare, I'll mention it here -- if any adjustment is to be made to the shaft length (addition or subtraction) now is the time to do that. I recently re-gripped an older driver and added a half inch of length to try and squeeze a few more yards out of it -- and this was the process used to get ready for that addition.

Often times, the selection of a new grip is made before you have the complete information on the butt diameter of the existing shafts. While there is certainly a better fit by using the proper core diameter on the corresponding butt diameter, most rubber grips will fit either way (up or down). Just keep in mind this is OK to do most of the time, but it won't always work.

Preparation

Once the shaft(s) are clean, your next step is preparation. Using your grip gauge, measure the butt diameter of the bare shaft (again, appx. 2" down from the end) and make a note of it. This shaft has a .600" diameter:

Butt diameters generally fall into two sizes: .580" and .600". Conveniently enough, the core diameter of most grips are also found in these two sizes. Many grips are available in both sizes so, regardless of the butt diameter, a good fit can be achieved. Refer back to the original grip measurement taken at the outset. By comparing this measurement to the standards (found right on the grip gauge) you can determine if the grip you need can be purchased as 'standard' size, 'mid-size', or 'oversize,' or if the shaft needs to be "built up" with a layer(s) of masking tape.

Based on your hand size (see chart), if it is necessary or desirable to create a larger grip than you can purchase ready-made, you can do so by applying a single (or multiple) wrap of masking tape to the butt end of the shaft.

This method can also be used to address a specific fit issue -- for example, a right-handed person who plays golf left-handed may have need for an enlarged grip only where the right hand grasps the club (their right -- dominant -- hand is larger and thus benefits from this fitting method).

When applying the build-up and/or double-sided tape, simply hold the shaft of the club between your legs with the butt end in front of you. While it may seem a bit archaic, it's easy, fast and works great. Simply spin the shaft with one hand while spiraling on the tape with the other. A little trial and error is necessary to learn the angle at which to apply the tape, but after a couple of false starts, you'll get the hang of it.

Now that you have all the dimensions to either duplicate, or create, the correct grip size, the replacement grip can be selected. I don't have the exact number, but would estimate that grip options range well into the hundreds these days. The primary categories of grips are: Rubber, Cord, Half-cord, and Composite (polymer). Within each of these categories lay a plethora of choices for style, color, actual material, weather condition suitability, and on and on. Since the categories and sub-categories of grips is so vast, I will not attempt to address them all here. Rather, you will soon find another complete article discussing in more detail these grip options. The grip I've selected here is a Men's .600" diameter Round. This is coded just inside the mouth of the grip as: M60R.

Once the proper base diameter has been established, you will need to apply a spiral of double-sided adhesive tape (generally 3/4" width).Double-sided tape is also available in pre-cut lengths of 1.5" wide tape. Either method is fine, but my experience has shown that spiraling the narrower tape is easier, faster, and yields a perfectly adequate adhesion of the grip.

When applying the double-sided tape, leave about 1.5 - 2" of excess tape available at the outset.

You'll need this to wrap over the open end of the shaft before the grip goes on.

Be sure to peel the protective layer off of the double-sided tape.

Installation

Now that the handle of the shaft is completely prepared, you are ready for installation. You'll need some kind of grip solvent to activate the grip tape and allow the grip to be easily slid on to the shaft. Again, grip solvents are a readily available from golf supply houses and you can even use acetone or lighter fluid in a pinch (use extreme caution, as these materials are flammable!). It is highly advisable to use a low CFC and non-flammable grip solvent.

Place the shaft in a rubber shaft clamp.

Then, clamp that into your bench vise.

(Note: for a club-maker/repairman, a bench vise is a must-have item. If you don't have access to one, you'll simply have to enlist the aid of a buddy to hold the club for you while installing the grip. On second thought, it's probably easier to go out and buy a bench vise).

Take note of the club head position as you want to have it as near to the final installation orientation as possible.

Once the shaft is in place, use some kind of device to catch or capture the solvent spill. A paint roller pan works well or any large, shallow basin that won't be harmed by the solvent (glass, metal, or sturdy plastic are all OK).

When you have readied all of this, its now time to prep the grip and actually install it on the club. For most rubber grips, just applying a liberal amount of solvent in the grip, covering both ends.

Don't forget the hole in the butt end:

Giving it a shake to distribute the solvent evenly is all you need. 

For stiff cord grips or especially the polymer grips (Winn, Karakal, etc.), place the grip in a microwave oven for 6-8 seconds before applying the solvent. Sounds weird, I know, but it really does help with this type of grip as they otherwise can be a bit of a challenge until you have some practice.

When you've wetted the inside of the grip with solvent, pour the excess solvent over the taped portion of the shaft, wetting the double-sided tape as well.

Then, quickly -- but without rushing -- lightly squeeze the open end of the grip to create a slightly oval shape, place this end over the club shaft...

... and in one smooth, continuous motion, using both hands, slide the grip onto the shaft until is fully seated against the butt end.

This process can slightly elongate a rubber grip, so to remedy this, place one hand against the butt of the shaft to hold the grip in place and gently pull back on the other end of the grip to gather it back to its original shape.

Alignment

At this point, there is but one thing left to do, and that is alignment. Again, moving quickly, but without rushing, remove the entire club from the bench vise and remove the grip clamp as well. Place the club on the ground and, while sighting down the shaft, make any final adjustments to the left or right to align the grip with the leading edge of the club face.

Though most grips are round, and a slight visual error is not a big deal, many grips are "ribbed" (i.e., they have an internal ridge/rib running down the back/bottom edge of the grip as an alignment aid for your hands). If you are using ribbed grips, be extra careful to properly align the grip so the rib falls in the right location.

All that's left now is to wipe up any excess grip solvent from the shaft or grip with a paper towel or rag, and place the club upright where the solvent can dry for at least 24 hours before use.

Grip solvent is reusable, so capture the excess and simply return it to the original container.

You're all done! You've installed your first grip and are ready to repeat as often as necessary. Remember, replace your grips at least every two years if you only play a little, and as much as twice per year if you play a lot. Having proper fitting, proper feeling golf grips will definitely save you strokes, regardless of your game. And why not? Now, you can do it yourself.

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The Most Influential Women Golf Bloggers http://www.zipgolfer.com/women-golf-bloggers/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/women-golf-bloggers/#comments Tue, 10 May 2011 16:53:54 +0000 ken http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=4170 According to the National Golf Foundation, women make up about twenty-two percent of all golfers. I don't know if that's what you expected, but what struck me about it was not that women are playing less than men, but that they are receiving disproportionately less media coverage than men.

And yet, a thriving online community of women golf bloggers are picking up the slack. Five years ago, that may not have been the case. But these days, women bloggers are producing news coverage, analysis and instruction from a unique perspective. In most cases, their writing is appropriate for golfers of both genders. But in some cases, their target audience is strictly women.

Below find a summary of some of the best women golf bloggers. These women have built a substantial readership by producing great content consistently. At the end of the list, you'll find another set of women who are "up and coming" in the world of golf blogging.

Let us know what you think of the list — hopefully you'll find some new bloggers to follow and enjoy.

Stina Sternberg - Golf Digest


A former golf pro in her native Sweden, Stina has been a host of "Big Break", a Senior Editor at "Golf for Women" and a part-time host on the Golf Channel. Oh, and she's also a mother of two.

Currently, Stina is a Senior Editor at Golf Digest, focused on instruction and equipment for women. Her posts are always professional and insightful. Stina is truly a must-read for anyone interested in the women's game. She also produces video tips for Golf Digest — check out one of my favorite Tiger Woods putting tips here.

Golf Digest Woman

Stephanie Wei - Wei Under Par

A former All-Ivy League golfer, Stephanie now runs one of the most-read independent women's golf blogs. And it's not difficult to see why. WeiUnderPar features several well-written and insightful posts per day. Stephanie and her staff are not just reporting the news — you can find that anywhere — but rather adding their personal interpretation about what's relevant and what's not.

Stephanie's the lead writer and editor and is at her best when bringing her personal touch to the site. See her post on losing a bet to Jason Kidd to see what I mean.

Stephanie's been featured in the Wall Street Journal and Sports Illustrated, but I think it's safe to say that she'll keep WeiUnderPar going for the foreseeable future.

WeiUnderPar.com

Pat Mullaly - Golf Gurls

Pat Mullaly's been blogging at GolfGurls.com for nearly two years now. Doesn't seem like that long, does it? But her site's got a ton of content and some very useful tips for women.

Pat's not that far from her "golfing newbie years", which gives here a unique perspective on what it means to be a woman new to the game. Add frequent posts that are extremely well-written and you've got a recipe for a successful blog.

Check it out but don't blame me if you start to hum while driving.

GolfGurls.com

Patricia Hannigan - Golf Girl


Patricia Hannigan's been a golf blogger for nearly five years, which is an eternity if you've observed the countless numbers of blogs that have been created, maintained and then abandoned in that same timespan.

But Patricia's one of the hardest working golf bloggers around, having built her brand from a personal outlet for a newly-obsessed golfer to a home for a unique, new-media golf industry consultant. At the same time, she's managed to add tons of entertaining posts to her site, to write a book for new women golfers, and to expose extensively — and often playfully — on gender issues in golf.

Golf Girl's Diary

Heather Jones - Real Women Golf


Heather Jones of Real Women Golf has had at least three full-time passions in her life: competitive figure skating, motherhood and golf. And how do I know that she's passionate about golf? Well, for one thing, she recently gave up coffee for the sport!

For another, her blog is filled with entertaining, personal stories about her own golfing experiences. Don't visit this site for the pro tour coverage — you can get that fix from others on this list. Instead read her periodic anecdotes to get an entertaining glimpse into the life of a surbaban mom making a go of it as a successful golf blogger.

Real Women Golf

Kristen Williams - The Golf Chick

Kristen Williams has an impressive resume as a golfer, despite the fact that she's only been golfing for about seven years. She's got two holes-in-one to her credit, along with a couple of club championships.

But her true claim to fame may be that she runs one of the longest-running independent women's golf blog on the web. And it's easy to see why. Though she doesn't post frequently (not enough for me, anyway!), when she does it's always worth a read. Check out her post on snowshoe golf if you don't believe me. Kristen's got a loyal following (with over 1,500 followers on Twitter) so I'm not the only one who feels this way.

The Golf Chick

Golfgal


Golfgal (aka "Gayle") has been at the helm of Golfgal since 2007. In that time, she's built up quite an impressive archive of insightful posts on golf for women, the business of golf, and a healthy dose of "Big Break" thrown in. Don't go there for the quick reads — though those are fun too — go there for the well-written analysis of some pretty thought-provoking topics.

Perhaps start with her post on the lack of women in online golf forums for Golfgal's take on how to address the digital divide between men and women golfers. You'll be glad you did.

Golfgal

Annika Sorenstam

I'm guessing you've heard of this next blogger. Only the greatest woman golfer to ever have walked the earth, Annika Sorenstam is a blogger as well.

Even in retirement, Annika remains one of the most influential voices in women's golf. Her work as a coach and USGA ambassador continue to enhance the status of women's golf at the professional and amateur levels.

Annika's blog is definitely worth a read. Her most recent posts focus on her newborn son but past posts have featured golf tips, updates on here personal and professional lives, and the occasional recipe for you golfing foodies.

ANNIKA Blog

Sophie Horn

After being featured in Sports Illustrated, Sophie became the most searched-for topic on the web for two days in 2010. It may have been for her blogging, but I'm guessing it may have had more to do with the bathing suit she sported.

Independent of her status as an internet pinup girl, Sophie is quite the busy woman. In addition to being a 4-handicap, she works as a model, a personal trainer and a golf coach. And, of course, as a blogger. Sophie blogs at SophieHorn.com as well as at ImagineGolfClub.com

Sophie Horn

Susan Fornoff - GottaGoGolf

Susan Fornoff cut her teeth writing about baseball in the 1980's. Author of "Lady in the Locker Room", Susan's been a sportswriter for nearly thirty years. The latter half of that was spent at the San Francisco Chronicle where she was, among other things, a golf writer.

Her full-time passion these days is, no surprise, golf. Susan recently founded GottaGoGolf magazine — read the latest issue online — along with an accompanying blog. Though the blog is still relatively new, Susan's credentials are impeccable, so check back periodically for top-notching posting.

GottaGoGolf Blog

Nancy Berkley

Nancy Berkley is a consultant to businesses and industry pros that want to do a better job of catering to women golfers. She also helps women with their golf travel plans.

Though her site doesn't sport a traditional blog format, don't be fooled. It's full of insightful tidbits as well as detailed analysis of the golf industry as it pertains to women.

Nancy also blogs at CyberGolf.com, GolferGirlCareers.com and LadiesGolfJourney.com. Phew!

Nancy Berkley

Ashley Crain - Golf Week

Most men don't understand what's so important about the role of fashion in golf. OK, most men don't understand fashion at all!

But Ashley Crain does. And she's turned that into a must-read blog at GolfWeek.com. Ashley (with some help from a handful of talented writers) goes way beyond reporting the latest news and releases from apparel manufacturers, though. Instead she conducts Q&A sessions with designers and apparel maker executives, reports on the latest trends on the pro tour, and offers the occasional critique of the pro golfer in need a bit of fashion advice.

Ashley's page at GolfWeek.com

Beth Ann Baldry - Golf Week

A former collegiate golfer and 10-year veteran at GolfWeek, Beth Ann covers the LPGA. Her writing is as precise and professional as you'd expect from a top-tier industry journal, making it a must read for anyone interested in the top women's circuit.

Beth Ann's also a frequent "tweeter" so, if you're a Twitter user and want more than her periodic long-form blog posts, be sure to follow her there as well.

Beth Ann's page at GolfWeek.com

Emily Kay - Waggle Room

Emily Kay recently signed on to become a primary writer at WaggleRoom.com. WaggleRoom, of course, is one of the most popular golf blogs on the web, so this surely an "influential" platform for Emily.

Emily's sharp wit and great writing have been showcased at National Golf Examiner, several New England-based publications and — teaming up with Susan Fornoff — GottaGoGolf.

Emily's recent take on Charles Barkley's swing proves that she's not afraid to go jaw-to-jaw with one of the biggest loudmouths in sports. If she keeps that up at WaggleRoom, we're in for a treat.

Waggle Room

Women Golf Bloggers to Keep an Eye On

We've tried to cover the most influential women golf bloggers above. But, of course, that's just a small sampling of the world of women's golf blogs. Below find some more great golf blogs written by women. Since surely some of these will ascend to the ranks of "most influential" in due time, you might want to start checking them out now.

  • Pink Diva Golf - News, fashion and shopping opportunities for women golfers. Updates tend to come in spurts, as with many blogs. But, if you're patient, you'll be rewarded with quality posts.
  • Katharine Dyson - Katharine is Vice President of the Golf Travel Writers of America. She's also an avid blogger whose work can be found on TravelGolf.com
  • Donna Hoffman - Donna's got a great thing going at WomenOnCourse.com, a women's golf networking site. The blog's got a nice backlog of insightful posts. Sadly, it hasn't been updated in a while. Hopefully Donna and her staff will get back to it soon.
  • Even Par Round - Miranda of Even Par Round has been providing direct-to-the-point updates for nearly six years. No words wasted, no images, no fluff. Just quick reads, each one worth your time.
  • Sherry Tabb - Sherry started Ladies on the Tee to be "The Voice of Women's Golf". And she's well on her way — having built up a nice backlog of witty and irreverent looks at the world of golf. Hopefully Sherry will get back to posting more frequently soon.
  • Augusta Golf Girl - Sandie (aka "Augusta Golf Girl) has put together a great set of posts on golf, the Masters and the Battle of the Sexes. She's more active on Twitter than on her blog, so it might be better to check her out there. Or read both.
  • Snooty Prima Dona - The woman behind Snooty Prima Dona may be a very nice lady for all I know. But the site represents her "alter ego who often appears when she's golfing and had one too many martinis" (her words, not mine). The result is a must-read if you don't mind your golf updates mixed in with a healthy dose of entertaining personal anecdotes.
  • Monique Ignacio - I challenge you to read Monique's "Girl Golfing" and not book a Philippine golfing vacation. Especially after viewing Monique's luscious photographs that complement her light-hearted posts perfectly.
  • Kristen Lewis - Kristen is awesome. And not just because she uses that word in EVERY single blog post. No, rather it's because her enthusiasm is infectious and her golf writing is inspriational to read.
  • Liza Churchill - In some ways, "Goldie Bounce Golf" exists to support Liza's radio program. But in most ways, the blog stands on its own merits. Updates are infrequent these days, but you'll find enough already there to warrant plenty of browsing around.
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Golf Bloopers: Funny Moments in Golf Caught on Video http://www.zipgolfer.com/golf-bloopers/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/golf-bloopers/#comments Tue, 18 Jan 2011 18:50:52 +0000 ken http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=3592

Golf is a popular pastime in many countries around the world and has been for many years. As high-profile professionals made the sport more enticing to young players over the past couple of decades, golf's popularity has gone through a tremendous surge in popularity.

Over the years there have been many amazing moments in golf - from unbelievable shots to amazing, come-from-behind victories. Along with these amazing moments have been some less-than-stellar ones. We're talking, of course, about the bloopers. You know, the screw-ups. The flubs. The Mulligans.

Below find a collection of some of golf's funniest moments caught on tape. Some you may have seen on SportsCenter and others you have probably never seen, but we scoured the web to find only the best. Enjoy!

1. J.C. Anderson Giving Advice on Sportscenter Goes Wrong
2. Woody Austin Gets a Bath
3. Drunken Leisurely Golfer Runs Himself Over with His Own Golf Cart
4. A Literal "Birdie"
5. When Golf Shots Go Wrong Pain May Follow
6. Bad Golf Shot, but He Thinks it Goes the Distance
7. A Perfect Example of How Not to Get Your Ball Out of the Water
8. Out of Control Golf Cart
9. How to Piss Off a Goose
10. Revenge for All the Birds Hit by Surprise Golf Balls
11. This is Just Bad Driving of a Golf Cart
12. This Shot Unfortunately Flies the Wrong Way
13. A Young Aspiring Golfer Takes a Fall
14. Standing in the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time
15. This Is Not Really a Blooper but Had to Be Included Because of Stupidity

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The 100 Greatest Golf Shots of All Time http://www.zipgolfer.com/100-greatest-golf-shots/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/100-greatest-golf-shots/#comments Tue, 21 Sep 2010 16:00:40 +0000 Robert http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=3324 Tiger's 16th at Augusta. The Shot Heard 'Round the World. Tom Watson holing out at the '82 US Open.

These are some of the shots that immediately come to mind when we think of the Greatest Golf Shots of All Time.

But what about some of the lesser-known great shots? How about a double-eagle by a ten year-old? Or an albatross on a par 6 by a three-time British Open winner? Or a fourteen year-old girl who teed it up with the best men on the planet, and missed the cut by a single stroke?

These, and many other incredible shots, are here on our list of the Greatest Golf Shots of All Time.

Most shots are accompanied by video, so you can revisit some old favorites or check out some amazing golf for the first time.

Enjoy the list. And, as always, please no wagering.


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Rid Your Lawn of Cows, Tigers and Other Unwanted Pests http://www.zipgolfer.com/pests-on-the-lawn/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/pests-on-the-lawn/#comments Thu, 03 Jun 2010 15:17:32 +0000 ken http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=2994 Lawn-Based Pest Control is a topic that tugs at the heartstrings of both golfers and non-golfers alike. Traditionally at odds, these two groups certainly agree on the value of recreation in a natural, wild and pristine environment. Without any damn interruptions from wildlife!

With that in mind, we bring you the world's first comprehensive guide to Lawn-Based Pest Control. Here you'll find techniques for controlling such common pests as cows, gophers and, of course, alligators.

Our techniques have been well-tested in the wild, but have never been revealed in a single, easy-to-reference guide. Until now. Enjoy, and let us know how it works out. Or, on second thought, don't. We'll be out enjoying nature. Without the animals.


Bambi, Meet Tiger

Deer love golf, it's true. And who can blame them? Their short game is nothing special, but look out for those woods. On the other hand, controlling deer is serious business. Just ask the Baltusrol Golf Club in New Jersey — they're pushing to allow hunters on to their course to take care of their deer problem. But they really needn't go that far. We've got a much simpler solution.

Added Bonus: Put An End to Those Silly Tiger Jokes

A couple of hungry tigers on your favorite golf course would not only help keep the deer population in check, but would also be a beautiful addition to an already scenic wilderness environment. And, as an added benefit, it would free up some tee times and make it much easier to book your Sunday foursome at the last minute.

"Hey Bob, think you can get us a tee time at Baltusrol this morning?"

"Oh yeah. Just bring some raw steaks and we should be fine."

And what will Baltusrol do with these tigers when they're not hunting buck? Easy... they'll put them to work. Tigers make excellent caddies, provided they've had enough to eat.

Fig. 1: Who you calling a philanderer?!

Put an End to The Cow Chip Shot

The problem of cows taking over golf courses has become an epidemic. No less an authority than the New York Times recognizes this. Check out their story entitled "Cow Swallows a Golf Ball and Dies." And, if that kind of thing could happen back in 1897, imagine how bad the problem has gotten today.

One-Iron Wednesdays

How do we clear our golf courses and lawns of these menacing creatures? Two words: one irons.

By now I'm sure you've heard Lee Trevino's advice — "If you're out on the golf course and a lightning storm rolls in, just hold up a one iron. Even God can't hit a one iron."

Lee was exactly right, which is why one-irons have gone the way of the persimmons wood and the gutta percha ball. But it's time to bring them back... to scare off the cows.

With that in mind, courses infested with unwanted cows should offer a free round to anyone with a bag full of one-irons.

Go ahead, pull one out and take a mighty lash. Watch your golf ball fly perilously close to the ground like a drunk crop duster. Be sure to make a full shoulder turn as you will need to create enough club head speed to fully frighten the cow. You get no points for simply amusing it.

Fig. 2: "Under the Hereford, left of the Guernsey, then roll it up next to Ol' Bess."

Take a Lesson From the Pros

Devious. Sneaky. Deadly. These three words bring to mind one and only one lawn-based pest. We speak, of course, of the Gopher.

Who Ya Gonna Call?

It's no surprise, then, that the gopher is the subject of the most well-known media coverage of lawn-based pest-removal. Witness Exhibit A — Carl Spackler in Caddyshack.

Carl taught us the value of patience, ingenuity, and a whole lot of dynamite in dealing with the most persistent of all pests. Should this humble how-to guide result in the creation of a Pest-Removal Hall of Fame, Carl will be our first inductee.

See for yourself...

Fig. 3: Beware the Varmint Cong

Bring Your Dog to Golf Day

Stories of unwanted foxes interfering with the great game of golf abound. And we're not just talking about the sly foxes of children's fairy tales. These foxes bite and, worse yet, approach unsuspecting players who are in the act of putting!

Clearly these pests must be controlled.

Unleash the Hounds

In the wilderness, bobcats and panthers do an adequate job of keeping the fox population in check. But seeding a golf course with panthers can be expensive. This is why your favorite golf course needs to sponsor a "Golf with Fido Day." Bring your wily Weimaraner, your diligent Dalmatian, or your gargantuan Great Dane.

I'd like to see those stubborn foxes stand up to my dog Penelope. Before I could get a tee in the ground, she'd have the neck of one of those sly devils in her mouth, spinning it around like a noise maker on New Year's Eve.

Golfers please remember to pick up your dog poop. And of course there is no penalty for balls stolen from the green by a Labrador. (Take a free drop nearest to the crime scene.)

Fig. 4: "We'll let them play through"

Them's Good Eatin'

Crows steal golf balls, frighten golfers with their menacing screeches and cause endless online debate that distracts from endless online debate about putter size.

And they're crafty. Which means we need to get smart in our approach to chasing them off.

Required: One Cranky Neighbor With Shotgun

Crows mate for life. Awwwwwww. That's perfect, since we can use this knowledge to lure them off of the golf course and into our grumpy neighbor's yard. And if our neighbor just happens to be Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino? All the better.

Should be simple enough — I've seen some pretty intricate remote control planes flying around at the park. I'll design a remote control crow sex goddess. Give it a sultry "Squawk" and a large pair of crow knockers and let cupid do his thing.

Sing with me now... "Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near? Hey crows, GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN!"

Fig. 5: The Eagle Has Landed

Damn Funny If Only It Weren't True

Beetles can be an especially annoying pest to deal with when attempting to keep a lawn pristine. They're tiny, mostly silent, and have a voracious appetite for all things vegetative.

No, Actually, It's Still Funny

Luckily, keeping them under control is a straightforward matter. Just follow the lead of the Australian Goverment: import an exotic species of toad from a land far away and let it go to work. And if you're worried that the toad may multiply uncontrollably since it has no natural predator in its new environment, thereby creating a problem much worse than the original?

Relax, you're over-thinking things. Or at least you're thinking more than the Australian Government did when it tried this technique.

The good news is that golfers — and Australians — are a resourceful bunch. Just let a few of them loose on the course after hours with an old VW bus and watch the fun begin.

Fig. 6: You can't make this stuff up

Send Those Geese Back to Canada

Every American golf course has a problem with Canada Geese. And, while we had hopes that recent, restrictive immigration laws would help keep these foreign-born pests out of our country, we were also prepared to call in the authorities if necessary.

But we are now ready to recommend a new, more innovative approach that will put a halt to the problem at its source.

Lead Them on a Wild Goose Chase

In deference to PETA, we've decided NOT to recommend combining golf with hunting (Gol-Funting anyone?). That would certainly take care of the geese, but might give high-paying repeat customers a severe case of the yips.

No, instead we're going to trot out Amy from 1996 Hollywood sleeper Fly Away Home. Amy raised a bunch of orphaned geese from chicks and then single-handedly deported them in an ultralight airplane. In Amy's honor, we will be opening a summer camp for teenage girls and teaching them to fly ultralights in lieu of joining the girl scouts.

The way we see it, everyone wins. The girls learn a valuable skill, we get our golf courses cleaned up and America's collective waistline can stop fearing Girl Scout Cookie Season.

Fig. 7: Kids + Geese + Golf. I Smell an Oscar!

Here Gator, Gator, Gator....

Alligators and golf are, quite simply, a bad match. Check out these 180,000 articles for more on the topic. Needless to say, it ain't pretty — one guy even scored a quadruple-bogey.

I Said Marshmallows, Not S'Mores!

We've touched on this topic before. But, in that context, it was a matter of protecting yourself in the face of danger. Now we're talking about something much more important — protecting the sanctity and serenity of golf courses throughout the Southeast USA. If golfers cannot golf in peace, without the threat of alligators chasing their balls, then what kind of nation have we become?

The solution remains the same, however. Alligators love marshmallows, and this craving must be exploited in the name of peace. At ZipGolfer, we've developed a special, water-insoluable, exploding marshmallow that can be covertly placed in water hazards throughout Gator Country.

Ignoring frequent explosions and dodging the occasional hunk of flying, charred gator flesh are a small price to pay for being able to line up a 20-foot putt without keeping one eye on the nearest sand-trap rake.

Fig. 8: Keep Head Down, Left Elbow Straight

A Last Word

It's true that we haven't covered all the pests you might encounter during your regular scramble. But the rest should be pretty obvious. Got Moles? Try rubber mallets. Herring? Horseradish. Evil spirits come back to haunt an ancient burial ground? Lay off the magic mushrooms.

For other pests, you'll need to ask for special help in the comments below.

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Screw You, Tiger! http://www.zipgolfer.com/screw-you-tiger/ http://www.zipgolfer.com/screw-you-tiger/#comments Thu, 25 Feb 2010 04:16:51 +0000 ken http://www.zipgolfer.com/?p=2345 Hate Mail From Those Not Ready to Forgive & Forget

Are we really getting ready to let Tiger of the hook? After one scripted press conference, ESPN practically tripped all over itself saying that Tiger has taken the right steps to be restored in the hearts and minds of the American Public.

But what about those who are not so willing to forgive and forget? Most of them are too polite to rip Tiger a new one, too proud to sound off in public, or legally bound to keep their mouths shut.

What if they could tell Tiger how they really felt? What if they could write Tiger a letter, giving him a piece of their minds? And what if we could get a hold of those letters and share them with our readers.

Here's just a sample of how those letters might read...




From Rachel Uchitel - New York

Screw You, Tiger!

You paid me two million bucks to shut me up, but I'll let you have it anyway. You told me I was "the one", but I guess you were lying about that. I'm sure you told Elin that a few years ago, too. How many of the other sluts and porn stars heard that line?

You wrote me email love notes, ferried me around the world to meet you on the sly, and now you've got the balls to go into "sex rehab" so you can repair your relationship with your wife?! Good luck with that.

P.S. I only slept with you because you're famous.



From Phil Mickelson - San Diego, CA

Screw You, Tiger!

Playing second-fiddle to you for the last decade is now officially "humiliating." As I watched you rack up hundreds of millions of dollars in winnings and endorsements, I knew that, in any other era, I would've been celebrated as the best golfer in the game.

And while you were busy building up your phony "family man" image, I was actually living it, taking time away from the tour to look after my cancer-stricken wife.

I'm now going to rededicate myself to preventing you from breaking Jack Nicklaus' vaunted record.

The sport deserves better than you.



From a Pissed-Off Pop in Peoria

Screw You, Tiger!

My sixteen year-old son has been practicing obsessively for the last ten years in order to become the "Next TigerWoods".

He now finds himself on the verge of making his high school golf team as a result of his hard work. He's also wondering if you've single-handedly destroyed the game's popularity and dignity.

Should I send you the bills for his golf lessons, or just for lost future earnings and psycho-therapy?



From Elin Nordegren - Windermere, FL

Screw You, Tiger!

While I was home raising the kids, you were out messing around and lying about it. You had at least fifteen "other" women, plus countless more you haven't told me about. Oh, and thanks for letting me know via the "National Enquirer" — very classy.

Thankfully, others will now start to realize what a jerk you are, despite your carefully crafted image.

You told everyone that I didn't come after you with a three-iron that fateful night. Maybe they bought that story, maybe they didn't. But, just between us, nobody would've blamed me if I did.

Now sign these damn divorce papers and leave my check for $300 million on the kitchen table.



From The Golf Writers of America

Screw You, Tiger!

We spent the last decade building you up to be an American icon. Though we endured your immature sense of humor, your penchant for swearing and your bratty vindictiveness, we instead wrote about your skill, your competitive spirit and your devotion to family life.

Maybe a few of us even caught wind of your extramarital affairs but chose to look the other way. Thanks in no small part to us, you're now a billionaire.

And how do you repay us? By shafting us at your press conference. Next time you've got one of those planned, why not just invite TMZ.com and the National Enquirer?

Oh wait, you've already given them enough front-page material to last a lifetime.



From Jesper Parnevik - Jupiter, FL

Screw You, Tiger!

I vouched for you when I introduced you to one of the most beautiful women in the world. She was a personal friend of my family and nanny to my kids. And this is how you treat her?

I let slip a few public comments about what a bastard you are, but I sure wish I had just waited until the next time we shared a tee time. That way, I could've clocked you in the head with my backswing.

Either way, watch your back.



From a Disappointed Dad in Des Moines

Screw You, Tiger!

The other day I had to sit down with my twelve year-old son to explain why what you did is "not cool."

Let me tell you that when Dad says it's hip to be a family man, it doesn't stand much of a chance next to you saying "I deserved to enjoy all the temptations around me."

Let me ask you this... when you chose to abuse your power as a "hero," did you ever stop to think about the effect it might have on the kids that worship you?

Didn't think so.



From Rush Limbaugh, on Behalf of Black Women Everywhere

Screw You, Tiger!

While you were winning awards like "sexiest man ofthe year", "athlete of the decade" and "celebrity we'd break our vows for," you were out banging bleach-blonde white women.

Are you one of those black men who uses his money and fame to turn his back on his race? Are you trying to send a message to black women that the ultimate trophy wife or partner for an extramarital affair is white?

Next time you're going to sleep around or get married — and it sure looks like you'll be single soon — be sure to NOT let any black women know. They won't be waiting for you.




From Apolo Ohno - Vancouver

Screw You, Tiger!

When you were sniveling through your script and saying absolutely nothing at your tearful press conference, did you notice that a little thing called the "Winter Olympics" was going on?!

Some of us have spent the bulk of our lives perfecting our skills while, at the same time, managing to NOT cheat on our girlfriends or wives.

If you haven't noticed these athletes, perhaps you'll recognize them for their love of sport, their pursuit of ultimate personal achievement and their spirit of international competition.

Or maybe not... you seem to be too busy stealing headlines, filling tabloids and wrecking people's lives.



From William D. Green - New York

Screw You, Tiger!

I based Accenture's entire ad campaign on you, plastering airports with glowing signs that said things like "Go Ahead - Be a Tiger".

Thanks so much for making us the laughingstock of every travelling businessman. Sure we'd like to get back the $50 million we paid you, but the damage you've done to our reputation is worth a lot more than that.

Hopefully Nike will follow suit and drop you like we did — that ought to hit you where it hurts. Of course, I'm sure they'll wait until they've sold out some of their backlog of Tiger-themed products. I assume those will be on the clearance rack any day now.




Of course, we didn't have time to print all of the letters that might've been written. Notably absent are letters from offended Buddhists, Ian Poulter, WGC Match Play event organizers in Arizona, diehard golf fans, Tiger's foundation, and celebrities who didn't cheat on their wives.

Seems like Tiger's offending people faster than he can pay to shut them up.

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